I can be Happy, I can be Free
by ScarletFire18
Summary: A oneshot taking on Elsa’s Let it Go. This is an attempt on explaining Elsa’s freedom, her joy at independence for the first time in forever


Elsa trekked up the mountainside, brushing past the blizzard; disregarding the unaffecting wind that howled in her ears and slapped against her face, the rushing blurring snowflakes that swirled around her being, almost clouding her vision. Her expanding powers couldn't be restrained anymore, and it showed through the landscape. Not like they were much to begin with, even with her fingers caged with restricting silk gloves: getting longer as she grew older, getting thicker as her steady age made the magic rapidly grow every year.

_Conceal, don't feel, _was her recitation; a repetitive saying to confine what she possessed, what she emoted, even being wordless and expressive was enough to snap the suppression.

_It never was really successful_, she thought. Those gloves led her to a severely forlorn life, it added 13 years of terror, remorse, and depression. It was failure, a fruitless try at covering up her emotions and her hands, and now one of her gloves was gone, stolen by Anna, formerly unaware of the abnormality that was Elsa.

She scrunched her face in frustration, and glared up at the dark cloudy sky; the wind cried out louder, responding to the negativity in her heart.

_How, Father? How could I try and feel nothing, only emptiness? How could I just be something I'm not and pretend to be ordinary? All this fear is a _part_ of me, my magic is a part of me, what I feel always comes out, because I'm still...human._

Elsa observed her surroundings, the snow practically glowing with its purity, it's beauty, and she couldn't deny that it was a sight to behold.

Not a footprint to be seen, untouched by nobody but the Snow Queen, her tracks invisible to anyone—excluding herself. A pathway to being alone, as far away as she could get from Arendelle. She travelled all the way up for isolation, secluding herself from her kingdom, her family, her responsibilities as just crowned ruler.

Don't let them in, don't let them see.

_I let myself in the crowd, tried a new aspect of life: socializing for all the practice I've done as the future monarch. They saw me, the real me, at what I could do. They were brimmed with fear at my shocking display of magic; the children protected by their mothers, the men almost cornering me at seeing what could be called witchcraft. I almost believed I was a freak. But I'm not._

Be the good girl you always have to be.

_Am I doing the right thing? Should I be afraid if people are coming for me, and be the disciplined submissive girl I was? I mean, I've never been on the side of wrong. I did all of this for Anna's protection. My intentions were worth something. _

Don't let them know.

_The past can't be redone. The past has come and gone, and the villagers and other visiting royalty have all seen the same thing. They all know, and you know what? I don't care anymore. I'm letting it go; _all of it.

Elsa's blue eyes hardened in resolution, the defiance of being her own person, so accustomed to following rules, to wearing this material on her skin longer than the age when she almost killed her sister.

She freed her hand, throwing the glove in the wind, it understood that she didn't want anything to do with that anymore.

She clenched her hands, visualizing on what to do first.

_Snowflakes!_

Easily parting the snowflakes above her head from the storm, she excitedly opened her palms and threw them in the air, and hundreds of little glistening patterns seeped out, hovering over her and waiting for a command.

She guided her arms to the left, and they followed her movements. Every which way she chose. She twirled one hand in her face, spiraling the snowflakes around her body, feeling a surge of power in her veins.

Elsa sent some blowing forwards, smiling elated as she directed the others to push her, she loved playing with them. And this was only the beginning of release.

She waved her index finger, the ground swirling and rising to a triple set of snowballs: bottom sized large, medium sized middle, smallest top. A replica of what was made as a childhood favorite, the lovable snowman who gives out free warm hugs. He may not have actual warmth, but he'll give that to you in your heart.

_Good to see you again, Olaf._

She uplifted her arms as the wind fluttered her cape, greeting her like an old friend.

She smiled in content and shut her eyes momentarily; fingers twitching and grabbing hold of a multitude of cascading snowflakes at her sides, her right arm ceasing their motions and thrusting vertically to the ground, while her left sent them away, but not before dropping some in her hands and watching them melt into her skin. Holding her magic briefly was also an amazing feeling.

She was losing care fast on the past. Who needed to worry about what others think when there's nobody around? Who needed their judgment holding her down when freedom was giving her the chance to rise?

But there was something else that demanded the feel of the air, not to have the traditional handiwork donned on her shoulders. Fit for a regular Queen, but not her. She was far away as regular as to come, and she didn't feel ashamed to admit it. Unclipping the weight on her back, it fluttered away, possibly joining that glove.

She exhaled deeply, staring upwards, the conclusion of the mountain side, before nearing the summit.

_But beware of the chasm, a nearly bottomless hole with no way of escape._

She could see that, but she wasn't perturbed. In fact, she was enthusiastic at these possibilities of making it across with her powers, she could see it in her mind's eye.

_The elongated railings crafted of thin translucent ice, the staircase wide and broad with frosty patterns, thicker and more sturdier, but not indestructible._

**XX**

It's funny to say the least for Elsa at how a greater distance can make things so insignificant, meaningless. Like the separation from Arendelle to the North Mountain. The fears that were in that castle, bounding her in that bedroom, couldn't reach her here. They used to control her in personality and behavior and she just let it happen!

_Well, not anymore!_

She was walking backwards for a bit, nearing the abyss with her back turned, distinguishable trees down below and in the distance, blocking the sight of Arendelle. She could detect the kingdom behind, (not just from her passing them on her way here), concealed from view,

an advantage of her letting go of the past was metaphorically blocking it. She couldn't see anything, and frankly, didn't want to.

She turned around vigorously, a vibrant smile curving her mouth. The chasm was right underneath, just some yards away.

Fisting her hands, summoning the magic within her, she blasted the edge of her side of the mountain, snow configured to be a staircase, with about a dozen steps and thick constructed railings of large clinging frost.

_Not bad at all for her first effort, and there's always room for improvement._

Hastening towards her foundation, taking that first step; she self-assuredly, fearlessly sprinted up, arms outstretched and assembling, shaping her first masterpiece. A hundred steps of sleek straightened ice, solidified to perfection; pure cerulean. Narrow railings, snowflakes fractaled everywhere.

But if _that_ was a work of art, then this finale will be expertise.

_A sublime colossal structure: resplendent pillars, turrets. A sprouting spire, stretched tall as the peak of the North Mountain itself._

Here I will stay, here I can influence my power to the highest, _here_ I will stand and be independent! Be liberated! Have a captivity in my own right, but not inwardly! I'm letting go! _Here_ and _now!_

Elsa pounded her foot on the snow, and an ever elongated icy snowflake, perfect and clear cut, horizontally 80 feet burst from her. She was gonna use a great deal of power for this, and it was beneficial for her.

Relishing this moment, she brought up her arms, trembling with much adrenaline, she wasn't going to waste it.

Walls of the finest ice, gorgeous textures of blues as their color, scattered around the rising refining dominion.

Every room was adorned with woven vines of frost, every room had some kind of iced accessory, had their own purpose. A throne room for the Snow Queen, a dungeon buried underneath like how it's supposed to be, for any trespassors, an armory of swords, spears, and halberds.

Her pillars bound with the lofty ceiling, the second finalized floor, and plummeted downwards on all edges to link the first floor and hold it together.

Statues of sentries, watchmen bearing swords held up to the midst of their faces fancied the entryway. Seemingly endless corridors zigzagged around the bottom floor, going beyond the double set of elaborate staircases to carry Her Majesty up whenever she liked. This was her home.

Elsa spun around, moved her arms like an orchestral composer, additional individuals of ice statues, carved, embodied to be her family in a room of memories. But even she didn't know where that was, not yet.

She shot, tossed an effulgent icy blue sphere; escalating to the top and intensifying into hundreds of heavenly ice crystals, quite transcendent and not quite natural. A chandelier was her finishing touch for this castle, and she was delighted to see her inspired spires as high as the summit, she was finished with her work. And there was lot to discover and find for her oblivious mind. As she's never seen what was created below.

Her asserted bedroom shone like a sun reflected sea, and she could see above that the blizzard was clearing, dissipating to soft flurries.

Sunrise was approaching, the fiery rays beaming on her solitary kingdom. The warm colors blending in with the cool colored solid.

She felt reasonably off, there was a piece missing from her icy played board. When it's all connected, freedom will be at its highest.

It was her coronation dress: a turquoise dress with long tight hickory brown sleeves, embroidered with fancy lines, custom made for every crowned Queen.

She took off the golden headpiece, and hurled it away. She loosened her formal hairstyle, a side braided bun, to a french braid, her platinum blond hair needed some freedom too, to sway behind her back.

Elsa waved her hand at her figure, minuscule glittering white amongst her transformed neon blue dress that flowed with her movements, loose and free.

A specialy made slit at her leg permitted her lower body to move gracefully. It was a beauteous outfit for a woman winter incarnate. She beamed at her work, at how much she accomplished with her gift.

A dusting of snow was in her hair, a few snowflakes on her hair like little hairbands.

With another hand gesture, a stretched cape of lucidity, a lighter blue hue bedecked with snowflakes and curved lines of her own design.

_This_ was she was meant to be! This was her present and future! Winter was her companion, and she didn't have to be fearful of her magic when there was a positive side.

_Beauty and danger. Believed to the latter when she could've chosen that little light in that darkness._

Her doors opened for her, to an overview of the landscape, the distance mountains, the calm winds to greet her, always close by to tickle her ear or blow against her face, like it was doing now as she stood on the balcony: tall and confident, daring to unleash her full strength when she so desired.

The sky's light splashed on her face, and she embraced it, she embraced herself, the cold never bothered her.

Elsa slammed the doors cryokinetically; to explore her true self.

_And if anyone comes by, I'll be ready. _


End file.
